Monday, February 25, 2008

Judgment??!?!

I am irritated.

Last week in a fit of unprecedented optimism (mixed with the requisite dash of boredom and catalyzed by excessive free time at work) I started poking around the personal ads on Craigslist.

I know, I know...

But I figured it can't hurt to look, right? And at least it's free.

Besides, if it all goes downhill, at least it will give me something to blog about.

Right. So after some heavy photo consultations with DS, I threw out responses to a few ads. At first I was only responding to ads with photos, but then I decided to throw caution to the wind and popped off a few to guys without photos as well. Why not? If I'm gonna do it, might as well go for broke.

First, I would just like to say... Guys? Be realistic! Don't say you are a "dead ringer" for Colin Firth if you are not. That's just not nice.

And then...

And then there's this guy.

Cute, right?

So I shot him an email and the following conversation ensued:


From: B------ (xxxxxxx@hotmail.com)
To: Froggy
Subject: RE: Craigslist is definitely a little weird.
Sent: Sat 2/23/08 4:17 PM


i'll be at virgin megastore monday after 5 for a while, writing.

--------------------

From: Froggy
To: xxxxxxx@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: Craigslist is definitely a little weird.
Date: Mon, 25 Feb 2008 08:48:23 -0500


I would have written sooner, but it was a rough weekend. Sadly I am already otherwise engaged this afternoon. Another time perhaps?



[Ed Note: I'm getting a haircut.]
--------------------

From: xxxxxxx@hotmail.com
To: Froggy
Subject: RE: Craigslist is definitely a little weird.
Date: Mon, 25 Feb 2008 11:11:26 -0500


I browsed your myspace page and threw up a little bit in my mouth. Healthy means "spends a measurable amount of time OUTside of bars"



[Ed Note: See? This is what I get for using my real email address, which I never do... damned optimism! And wait, what the hell is in my MySpace profile anyway? I made that when I was... what? 24? Oh, under interests it says "beer, jamesons, pool, loud music, dive bars, dirty martinis, trying to avoid people who suck." Clearly I am an alcoholic as opposed to, oh, not taking MySpace seriously.]
--------------------

From: Froggy
To: xxxxxxx@hotmail.com
Sent: Mon 2/25/08 11:55 AM


Hmmm, nice. I don't think I've updated any of that (tongue-in-cheek) info since I created that profile, um, 3 years ago? 4?

However, I really dig on being judged by people who don't even know me. Wanna get married?

Later,
Froggy
--------------------

From: xxxxxxx@hotmail.com
To: Froggy
Subject: RE: Craigslist is definitely a little weird.‏
Sent: Mon 2/25/08 12:04 PM

Don't you have any pride or dignity? (stupid question) STOP writing me

--------------------

And so I did.

Don't get me wrong, I was (and still am) sorely tempted to fire off one more bitchy message before adding him to my blocked senders list and thereby getting the final word.

But I decided to take the high road.

And blog about it instead.

And while he's just one jackass (one in a sea of thousands, to be certain, but just one), he does illustrate what I've often felt to be the underlying theme of all personal ads: If he's that cute, there's got to be a reason he's still single!

In this case, it's that he's a judgmental jackass.

But really? He's judging me?? He posted a personal ad on fucking CRAIGSLIST!

(And I answered it. Shit.)

Still... methinks this doesn't bode well for the remainder of this endeavor.

The next time I'm feeling optimistic, I'll just buy a lottery ticket.

17 comments:

Stephanie said...

Craigslist can be so, so good. Or really, really bad. Too bad you got a loser. Don't give up hope though, I know someone who met their FIANCE through Craigslist!

Deutlich said...

Dude. That guy? Fucking nuts.

Anonymous said...

Wow. That dude sounds like a serious headcase. I wish I could get off on belittling people but, sadly, I require real interaction of the positive sort. Or, more simply, what a douchebag! You don't want to make out with someone who just threw up in his mouth anyway.

amy said...

Ugh. What a fucking douchebag! Seriously, there are a lot of creeps out there ... But there are some awesome guys too ... (I say this, because, as you know, I met my boyfriend on CL and he's amazing!!! And I answered his ad--and there was no picture until we exchanged the obligatory "myspace" profile.) Don't give up!

Anonymous said...

Amy,

You are such a liar. My ad on CL included a picture of my penis and it clearly stated that I was a hipster sleazebag.

brookem said...

Yikes. What a wicked asshat. He's a loser.

amy said...

S, don't pay attention to the above comment ... It's Ed, and he's now obviously contradicting my comment! I guess he's just not *that* amazing afterall ... Men.

Jamie said...

Wow what a douchebag.

Samantha said...

what an asshat! ew.

Jess said...

I met Torsten on CL! I was scared precisely because of assholes like the one you encountered. But it worked out. I say stick with CL. I love reading about it.

ana said...

Craigslist can be a trap-hole for unassuming nutcases (like me). Last time I entered CL with an intention of browsing the strictly platonic section, but exited with a query letter written to negotiate the price of an antique Indonesian bed frame.

Princess Pointful said...

Seriously?
What an epic douche bag.
And I think you got a way better last word anyways, because your response was way better.
(ahem... stop writing me? After one response to his last comment? Argh.)

Expensive Mistakes and Cheap Thrills said...

holy shitballs.

that guy is the biggest looooser ever.

his picture isn't even that cute.

holding his guitar?

such a poser.....he prolly cant even play that thing..

maybe you should pose as someone else, mail him, bait him, and diss him big time!

Expensive Mistakes and Cheap Thrills said...

and to actually say 'stop writing me'????

why didn't he just ignore like any normal guy would have.

we have a word for people like him...

moron!!!

Hope said...

What. A. Fucking. Jerk.

The end.

poodlegoose said...

Umm... if we're into judging... He's holding his guitar up, while taking a picture of himself. If it had been while he was playing and someone else took it, that's one thing. He's obviously not that good or thinks he's better than he is or he wouldn't be making such a big deal about taking a picture with it like that. And why would he think Craigslist is weird while he posted a picture of himself holding up his guitar with a douchebaggy expression on his face? and what the hell does "confident about where I am" mean on an ad anyway?

Whatever. Sorry, I could go on for days. I'm Brandy, nice to meet you. I'm glad you didn't meet up with him in person. I mean, he's FUN for Pete's sake.

Searching for THE ONE said...

OMG, the wanna get married line is too funny! I absolutely know where you're coming from with the whacko's on the dating sites. Don't believe me check out my blog, the post with the title Boys are Crazy...

http://myonlinedatingdiaries.blogspot.com/