Thursday, February 21, 2008

We Have a Winner!

(Oh dear god, I wonder what kind of searches will pick this up??)



Yes, that's a vibrator sitting in my dish drainer.

See... shit like this is why living alone freaking rocks. No sneaking to the bathroom with it hidden behind my back whenever it needs a cleaning.

It's a good thing my parents live in a different state. My mother already found my vibrator once in college... I can't imagine the fracas that would ensue if she (or, god forbid, my father) were to encounter one occupying the same space as the dishes I grew up with (visible in the background, the one with the pattern than simply screams 1970s).

As you can see, I have broken my heretofore strict "No masturbating with animals" policy [Oh god the searches... -Ed.]. It seems that these days it's either a bunny, or a dolphin, or an elephant, or a butterfly, or... right. Who says bestiality isn't socially acceptable? [Christ I'm really asking for it. -Ed.] At least this particular bunny will be tickling my clitoris with his hands rather than his ears. Somehow that seems less... pervy.

To answer Jess's question, No. I did not go to Toys in Babeland (which is down in SoHo, on Rivington I believe). TiB, while "nice," is, in fact, ridiculously overpriced and their selection is appallingly small.

And I really don't go in for that whole "classy sex shop" atmosphere. It's like buying a dildo at Crate and Barrel.

I went to a place on 7th Ave that my friends and I randomly encountered after a birthday brunch last summer. It's got a much larger selection, better prices, and the staff is friendly and helpful without being creepy or pushy. The girl there (who can't have been more than 20) actually recommended today's purchase. I'll let you know how her advice pans out.

(Yes, of course that picture was taken pre-test-drive... what kind of perv do you think I am? Sheeze...)

Oh, and a word to the wise: If you ever find yourself purchasing a toy that runs on these...



STOCK UP!! They are absolutely freaking impossible to find. They're, like, the Abominable Snowman of batteries. However, the store came through for me today (they didn't have them before) and now the beloved purple bullet is back in action! Hoorah!

Clearly, there is gonna be a par-tay up in heah.

Or something.

Okay, I think I've aired my closet enough for one evening.

Whatcha got in yours?

15 comments:

Princess of the Universe said...

Mine is almost identical to yours...same colour, same bunny...
Have a great night!

Anonymous said...

Hm. Which rabbit have you got? I'm not sure yet that I like mine, and may be returning it for another.

Anonymous said...

Is that an "N" battery? (Like a AA, but just over half the height?) If so, try Radio Shack:

http://www.radioshack.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2146411&cp=2032056.2032150&parentPage=family

Samantha said...

Haha! You rock! I have a purple rabbit that takes 3 AA batteries.

ANA said...

I have one just like that in turquoise. Well my drawer is full of them. My favorite is the silicon rabbit (expensive too) but sooo worth it. Believe it or not, I have a crystal one too. Thanks Amsterdam, I love you.

megabrooke said...

Ha, you rock for posting this. It's almost worth any pervs that might find your blog, consequently, no?

I also think it seems a little more... normal? (that sounds odd too) that the bunny does the drick with his hands (paws?). Better than the ears, for sure.

Jess said...

Thanks for answering my question! I had no idea! I have never actually been to that store. I had heard it was the best. Now I know better!

B said...

HAHAHA! You've got me cracking up over here in my office! AND WHY did my coworker choose JUST THEN to stop by with thin mints when a) I've got a pic of the rabbit up and b) I CAN'T EAT COOKIES!

NOT . cool.

OC said...

Love it! I may own it's friend... in blue. MAY... just sayin'

How was your night with your new toy???

Anonymous said...

my polaroid land camera uses those batteries.

Princess Pointful said...

I love how you have all these anonymous battery people responding to this.
Mine looks like a penguin!

Princess Pointful said...

OMG! And looking beyond the rabbit... my parents totally had the same dishes when I was growing up.

Anonymous said...

Haha - there really should be a not in work warning on that. The guy sitting behind me now has the biggest smile on his face... *ahem* =] x

Pandora said...

I've just today discovered your blog,but I am definitely coming back for LOTS more if posts like these are the norm on your blog.It's hilarious!

And I must say,I am very jealous of your toy,mine is a straightforward,i.e. boring,vibrator,called "The Jewel".But yours looks MUCH more fun!

Lpeg said...

Yeah, I may have purchased that one, similar color, at the suggestion of a fellow blogger....

...totally worth it!