Monday, January 5, 2009

Are You for REAL?

I swear... if I get one more social networking request from a guy I had sex with and never heard from afterwards, I am going to lose it.

I mean... for real? You fuck me then ignore me, but you want to be my "friend" on fucking Facebook?

Unfuckingbelievable.

Ugh.

Anyway, in case you couldn't tell, I am seven different kinds of stressed out right now and all I really want to do is scream at the top of my lungs until I run out of air, but I worry that my neighbors might call the cops. And my bathroom sink isn't big enough (and my kitchen sink isn't clean enough) for the classic "Underwater Scream" that I developed for just such a purpose back when I still lived with my parents.

What do you do when your nerves are so bunched up that you're not sure whether you want to leap off your fire escape or punch someone? Being that neither of the above seem ultimately productive, I'm open to suggestions.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Scream at the top of your lungs into a pillow. I laugh my ass off ever time I do this.

Bridget said...

I go for a walk but it's effing cold out right now. I write. I have a glass of wine. I call my best friend. And occasionally, I throw things. I suggest pillows. Cell phones are too expensive to throw. Don't ask me how I know this...

Anonymous said...

bathtub scream? basement? I like the pillow idea too...

As for guys who request me after something like that? I write back saying, "Look, I vaguely recall XYZ, but it wasn't good enough for you to call me again or me to call you again so why bother now?"

Of course I'm quite a biznatch sometimes.

Princess Pointful said...

Underwater scream? Why have I never heard of this before?

And here I thought I hated people who add you on FB and never even respond to your comments on their wall. They are several points lower on the douche scale than these guys!!

Eleni Zoe said...

A couple days before New Years I deleted all the people that don't reply to my comments ever on FB, all the people that I haven't spoken to in over a year and all the guys that don't have any follow through.

I feel like a brand new woman.

P.S I'm a huge fan of throwing things. Just last week I broke my hairbrush after someone really pissed me off.

amy said...

I wish I had better suggestions ... I'm in the same f'ing boat as you but I can't even pillow scream because I'm at work. (W. is right, he told me to scream into pillows a long time ago and it kind of works.) When I'm this angry, I tend to just cry. But I can't do that either--again, crying at work is not very professional. Good luck to you! I hope you find your outlet soon. (Me too.)

So@24 said...

Whoa!

These guys but the ASS in clASSy!

Z said...

I tend to take long walks. And drink.

As for that guy - WTF?!?!

Anonymous said...

Maybe they don't have enough friends and they're trying to look popular? I will never understand Facebook. Then again, I never joined. Har har.

What do I do when my nerves are so bunched up? Punch people, definitely. There's way more satisfaction in it.

Dude, when you have the time, remove TLS from your blogroll please? thelisashow.org expired months ago and some spammy spammerson took it over. Ugh. I hope nobody thinks that's still me.