The Plot Fucking Thickens...

I have always had a tendency to make things more difficult than they need to be. I will make a school project more involved than the requirements state, or do something in a roundabout way that takes 5 times longer than it should simply because that's-the-way-I-want-to-do-it-damnit!, but now it seems this habit extends--subconsciously--to my personal life as well.

The following conversation took place between myself and C (the afore-mentioned friend that Maybe Crush likes to screw with), via lip-reading/stage-whispers hidden by scripts, halfway across a room during rehearsal this evening.

C catches my eye.

C: Are you and Maybe Crush dating?

Froggy: No, why?

C: [Another Girl in the Show] was asking and I didn't know, so I said I'd ask you. {pause}... Why not?

Froggy shrugs

C: I think you should!

and then, before I could stop myself...

Froggy: I do too!


Damnit! So there it is, the cat is out of the bag.

This conversation was followed by much gesticulation including a long-distance pinky-swearing of silence, but the fact remains that somebody knows. Somebody who actually knows who Maybe Crush is, and sees us together on a fairly regular basis.

While on one hand I now have a comrade in arms, as she told me to rest assured that she has no interest (which I pretty much figured) and would help try to facilitate meetings outside of school by dragging us both out socially, it was still exceedingly difficult not to behave differently on the group walk to the subway.

In some way it just feels like middle school all over again. It's so hard to be around someone that I am SO attracted to and have someone else in the vicinity know what's going on--it feels like I'm being scrutinized or something.

There is one up-side to all of this: somebody thought we were dating... that's gotta be a good sign, right?