Wednesday, December 5, 2007

I owe someone a cookie.

And that someone is... the lovely Miss OC!

She is the only one--that I'm aware of--that did my open-tag music meme. And I promised a digital cookie, so here it is! The Awesome Bloggers Deserve Cookies award! (It would be cooler, but all my artistic ability was poured into the creepy puppet head currently drying on my radiator).

OC, feel free to share this cookie with any other blogger that you feel deserves a sweet bit o' recognition :)

And if anyone else did the meme and I missed you, tell me! Cookies await!

This cookie also goes out symbolically to Ms. Jennifer Love Hewitt.

Now, now... before you throw tomatoes (or, god forbid, baked goods) at me, allow me to explain.

First of all, this is in no way an endorsement of her acting. The fact that she was allowed to play Audrey Hepburn should be considered a crime. That being said...

I'm sure by now most of you have seen the photos of her derrière splashed across the internet. Not being much of one for celebrity gossip (*gasp!*) it had escaped my attention until I saw it linked in a blog that I normally quite enjoy, followed by a comment to the effect of "I never thought my ass would look better than hers..."

I must admit I was unable to finish reading the post. This made me sad, I normally love this blogger.

But I looked at the photo and all I could think was...

My ass looks like that... And my ass is HOT goddamnit!

You wanna know why? Because just like real women have curves, real women have cellulite.

And English Ex wouldn't still inquire about my ass over the span of an OCEAN if it weren't something worth inquiring after, now would he?

Nor would the entire male staff of the first restaurant where I worked have formed a fan club for the celebration of my posterior.

No, I am not joking.

And then, in the midst of my turmoil, I came across this blurb on MSN while killing time at work.

A size 2 is not fat! Nor will it ever be," Hewitt responded in a post Thursday. "And being a size 0 doesn't make you beautiful."

So JLH, you may be a shitty actress... but this cookie is for you!


Libby said...

pass me some milk.
because i love me some cookies!

Hope said...

I had the exact same reaction when I first saw the picture.

"But but but, my ass looks like that."

It's just funny that the media make such a big deal when an actress/celebrity looks like a normal person.

Princess Pointful said...

Is that the cookie you told me I could have??

It looks about 12 times better than my failed cookie dough!!

(I'm so taking it)

OC said...

Your readers are taking my cookie! :) Just kidding, I'll share. It's the holiday season after all. And I need to keep my ass looking like JLH's.

Nice post btw. Real women do have curves!