Monday, March 3, 2008

Open Letters, Monday Edition

Dear Fashion Victim (Male),

Sagging your jeans looks stupid. Skinny jeans on men are also ill-advised.

But combining the two? Really?? You look like you're trying to wear your kid brother's jeans, to the effect that not only are they too tight, but you can't pull them up all the way.

For the love of god, go find some pants that fit!

Best Wishes,
The Frog Princess


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Dear Fashion Victim (Female),

Having nice legs does not make that sweater qualify as a dress. And no, tights are not the same as leggings.

Put on some damned pants.

Cheers,
FP


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Dear 6 Train,

Making us wait on the platform for 10 minutes and then running express? That's just mean. Please be more considerate in the future.

-Froggy


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Dear Body,

What is up with this whole tired thing you've got going on? Falling asleep at 9:30 last night? Totally unacceptable! Especially considering the ungodly amount of work we have to do this week.

Get it together!

Regards,
F

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Dear Brain,

Please start working. SOON. We can't have a repeat of yesterday's unable-to-form-a-coherent-thought ordeal. Boal journal must get written! It's due on Monday! Along with two other papers!!

I promise, come Spring Break I'll give you at least one day to do absolutely no work whatsoever. In the mean time, however, could we step up the productivity just a smidge?

Thanks,
Froggy


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Dear Froggy,

Those things sitting on top of your head? They're called "sunglasses." Instead of squinting like an idiot for several blocks, why not try putting them on?

-You-


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Dear Pants,

Yes, you are very cute, but must your cuffs flap about in such a way that they ensnare my 4" heels and send me tumbling down the subway steps?

Really, that was un-called-for.

Try to work on it?

Thanks,
Froggy


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Dear Subway Railing,

Thank you for being there. Really, I knew I could count on you.

Best,
FP


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Dear Guys Standing at Top of Steps,

Thanks for asking if I was okay. Your self-restraint in not laughing at my dumb ass made the incident slightly less embarrassing.

Cheers,
Froggy


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Dear Nose,

You can stop running any day now. Really, I won't mind.

-F-


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Dear Bloggy Friends,

I am dreadfully behind in my blog reading, and getting worse by the day! However, considering the afore-mentioned ungodly amount of work I need to accomplish, I shall be spending a decent portion of my work days doing school work, as opposed to reading blogs. I promise I'll be back and commenting when the week from hell subsides.

Love ya!
Froggy


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Dear Week from Hell,

Are you for real? Seriously? Christ... well do me a favour and go easy on me... 'kay?

Kay.

-The Frog Princess-

9 comments:

Deutlich said...

It really has been a trying week. Seriously.

Tina Vaziri said...

Why can't pants come perfectly hemmed to fit my body and self adjust to the heels I'm wearing each day?

Hope you don't fall down the stairs again!

Jess said...

Oh no! Falling down the stairs is the worst! I'm glad you're (mostly) okay.

Today has spring weather and the evil month of February is gone. Fingers crossed that these are good signs.

distractedspunk said...

Subway rails. So trite, and so necessary. Glad it was there to catch you. :)

poodlegoose said...

Oh, God. When I read the part about you falling down the stairs, my heart kinda stopped for a minute. I've been there, and it is terrifying. I'm glad that you had such friendly support.

I hope the rest of your week gets better!

Samantha said...

Sooooooo glad you didn't get hurt when you fell! How scary!

Essentially Me said...

These letters were classic! And I've done the whole falling in public because my heel got caught in the cuff of my pants. Good times!

chasinglibby said...

hahah the fashion victim ones are hilare! there is HUGE diff between tights and leggings, people!

cdp said...

I am still trying to picture what a dude looks like trying to sag skinny jeans.